~from like six months ago~
sometimes it's really easy to forget about unhappiness, when the sun is out, or there is work to be done, or just because almost everything everywhere is humorous. even crying in a mexican restaurant only lasted for about 2 minutes because the bathroom made me laugh. but then i read someone's sadness while listening to someone else's sadness and could understand why despair is called a pit and being inside it almost feels comforting because the dirt is really cold.

Life Is A Bitch- Fish Tank

the end of a film in which a mother and daughter have such a negative interaction but the connection is just for a second ok

sketchbook bits

"can feel my brain flipping between modes"

"was jesus was leading the way?"

"i think the dream began with a degenerative disease"

"reading in flight magazine and desolation angels. both make me feel restless"

"could we be happy? i'd love to find that again"

"i really want this to happen but i'm not going to push it"

"could study aspects of remorse- maybe after lies, robberies, or murders"

"i still can't shake the visual of crawling across that courtyard with a self induced wound"

i cry so easily that sometimes when tears well i think "maybe the sadness is always there just waiting to come out" even though if someone asked, i would say "i'm happy".